i finished masturbating and realized my blackberry had accidentaly called my grandmother in my pocket during it. awkward...
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
Do you think we're allowed to sign male strippers into the building with a valid id?
I might never shower again without beer.. I might also always drink naked
I'm pretty sure they changed the plants at the grocery store because of us
well we called the liquor store to tell them to stay open five more minutes so we could make it and they recognized our voices. I've never been more proud.
My inner 10 year old alcoholic is intrigued.
He just peed in the cab. I repeat..IN.
It was terrible. I am sore from head to toe, neither of us got off, and we were at it for an hour and a half, I faked having a heart episode so we could stop. It worked.
I tied him up for his boyfriend so he could get fisted... I'm the best roommate ever.
Wow. That's certainly more than I've ever done for a roommate.
I'm trying to imagine how upset he was when he realized that he had been cockblocked by a picture of a sloth and I am drawing indescribable pleasure from it.
I was trying to type "I just want you naked" and it put "I just want you baked"
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
Anything special planned for Valentines Day?
Does testing the strength of my coworker’s marriage count?
Randomize
