Good news! Whoever used this stall at Target earlier...not pregnant!
What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
We were done making out and had been asleep for a hour. I felt him put his hand on my butt. Then I farted.
Feel like bed is flying. Not sure where we're going. Hope there is candy.
Learn some fucking English or leave me alone! "Your" is for something that belongs to you, like 'your herpes'. And "you're" is a contraction for "you are", like "you're not sleeping with me".
You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
every time i recognize a doctor or patient at the hospital on this rotation, i just pray it's not from my blackout saturday makeout slut moments...professionalism shouldn't count on weekends
They got their marriage license when they were at the courthouse for her arraignment.
Well I turned her sobriety into my own personal drinking game
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
Good news: you're over the drunk crying life phase. Bad news: now you're handy and violent. You were groping me from behind in front of the guy you like, then you put me in a headlock and swept the leg.
It was an all night sausage fest and I was the lady of honor.
Like I don't care that he's a drug dealer, but I have a problem with his inefficient and ineffective business model.
Mixing Powerade and white wine has been one of my better ideas.
yeah but really his dick tasted like soap. like i was blowing a bar of soap
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