the sham wow guy got arrested for beating up a hooker.
I would really like to get high with Bill Nye. I'm being dead serious. Every step I take is literally a step I take because it will take me closer to Science Guy high.
We could get him to build Inspector Gadget.
I didn't know you were high TOOOO!!!
i told the bartender last night that if the palace saloon made a calendar he would be every month.
I just found her phone in the quesadilla maker...
Dude i'm seriously thinking about his nipples.
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
Thanks to you and Ketel One I now have a court summons with the actual word "frolicking" on it.
We got really stoned and then we fucked. Then he made me a panini.
Oooh, he sounds pretty classy
Actually, not at all. We were stoned so he made me a peanut butter panini. With a Rollo in the middle of it. And he left the panini press on all night. I could have died.
Just saw a man downtown with a cat just riding on his shoulder like a furry parrot. He may be homeless, but I think he's your soul mate.
I am pretty sure I just put SoCo in the bird feeder
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
I just formed the "shit on a tree in Chicago club." And I feel awful about it.
I'm going to be such a slut in Europe I've already decided
Send me dick pics. We'll make a scrap book
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
People don't believe me when I say the bruises are from work. They just smile and say "right." Trust me, I WISH my sex life was that exciting.
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