his balls ACTUALLY tasted like nuts
he conducted the entire waffle house into singing the song Oklahoma. He was wasted.
if we break up, who will get the dealer?
Its the little things i like about bein home like having actual toilet paper instead of subway napkins
I know he gets bloody noses a lot...so that explains all the blood...but I'd say the condoms are definitely from a penis.
Trying to convince my mother to let me take some of my sisters Lortab to sell is not going well
Those two lesbians inspired me. A whole new way to roll. Fuck shots. Gallons of vodka is the new tequila.
She's the perfect storm of great hair, big boobs, intellectualism, and mild moral ambiguity.
Why are we so great
Like I'm def going to a therapist but I wouldn't change a thing about us except maybe the peeing
Apparently 24 hr fitness frowns upon the ingestion of psychedelics on its premises, don't see that in the sign up contract.
almost just sent your mom a dick pic. almost.
Man, coughing on your period is like the biggest gamble a girl can make.
I think I just got suckerpunched by a 14-year-old.
Come get your boyfriend. He is hammered talking to me about hot dogs and casinos.
There is way too much butt cleavage here for a formal event.
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