she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
Your brother just successfully got half the bar mostly naked
We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
You kept buying everyone Washington apple shots, and telling us we needed to support local produce.
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
He did the "not my house dance." Apparently it involves spreading cereal on the floor and then grinding into the carpet in bare feet while singing "not my house" over and over and dancing.
ugh i can't even wear this perfume anymore. it just brings back blurry memories of blowjobs and regret.
I woke up to him peeling the skin on my stomach from my sunburn. If he wasn't so good in bed I'd be a little freaked out.
I think that the winner of this years fantasy football league should get naming rights to you child
This bowl of cereal would be the size of a giant's bowl-piece. It's. that. big.
How much did you smoke??
I'm dressed like a deranged cupcake. Let's get fucked up.
I'm not really made for random hookups.. i'm like a swan.. i don't wanna have random swan sex. i just wanna have one swan hubby and fly around the world together and eat bread that people throw at us..
I told the cop to try walking in heels and he'd understand why I was walking home without then on. He told me he only does that on Wednesdays.
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
And to be clear I have only watched porn like 3 times at work
Randomize
