Is it necrophilia if we're both dead?
btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
Pretty sure that this text will cost me like $5 but just wanted you to know that I just smoked a bowl of kush, about to walk around shopping for hookers and i get 3 credit hours for this study abroad .... have fun studying for finals.
his mom and i are swapping prescript pills..totally mother in law material.
I hope to God 2011 is the year I stop loving tequila.
I just watched a guy pee from a second floor window onto the line of 100 people waiting to get in.
There's still flour in my hair. And I don't even want to know what the neighbors think happened infront of my house.
I kept reassuring him that I was easy like Sunday morning, not easy like "I've had 6 shots of tequila and haven't had sex in three months"
Standing in my kitchen eating choc chip cookie batter from the bowl. As sad as it is, I kinda like the places bad breakups take me.
I'm pretty sure the guy in front of me at Walmart doesn't have good plans. It's one am he is buying a flash light and black bandanna
She pinched my nipples out of nowhere as I was about to come... I think I found god
The fabulous human disaster: it is him
i just saw a man in the grocery, sitting on the floor, eating out of a galon sized tub of macaroni salad. We need to get on his level.
Going through his web history. 10 hours ago he searched "how to put on condom with your teeth" I think I'm getting it tonight.
short story short, i just screamed anal seepage in the middle of a diner.
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