your room smells of hookers.
And success
Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
oh my god i just remembered the cat blow jobs.
i should have probably stopped drinking when my beer pong shots were hitting the other team in the face..
yeah thats usually a good indication.
he was wearing a tuxedo, i was naked...it's a long story.
She just kept tellin me God was coming back and he was leavin her with a bag of stale doritoes and shitty friends.
Just had a guy dressed only in a towel ask me for a cig, hug me and kiss me then proceeded to pee of the balcony while still talking to me and callin me baby
There's a good chance a guy sucked off my right earring last night
all i wanna do is drink skittled vodka, fuck my gf, and pass out in my neighbors hot tub naked
I swear she lies about being allergic to gluten so she'll get all the jack and not have to drink shitty beer like the rest of us
Getting stoned and sitting front row in a legal class.. Not my best idea
This means I've slept with 2 ppl that live in vans...my life is complete
My ex came over to hook up...then I went on a date 2 hours later and got a bj. Single: Finally doing it right.
I just hip-checked Santa and stole his cab.
so we have roughly decided that hes the dude all the chicks will bang in college, just so he will do their term papers
Randomize
