so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
We just took turns doing keg stands. 27 is way too old for this. Out of 5 of us, our best time was 9 seconds.
I just ditched my friends to hang out with the chilis restaurant crew...one of these girls better have daddy issues
I've reached the point to where my pre-gaming needs to be limited to pre-inning-ing
I might as well rub my vagina against it before I throw it away.
anyone who texts me today gets a complimentary picture of my mangled foot. starting with you.
ewwwww wtf when you left last night you were fine?
She shit all over my seat. She is not allowed in my car under any circumstances. Not even with drugs. You can't forgive a shit.
Let's go get coffee and handcuffs.
took shots off of a myriad of fake boobs last night. It was glorious.
I'm turning into an adult here.
Adults touch each other's special zones.
Do they still have sex clubs in San Francisco? Because that'd be an interesting way to spend Easter.
I'm storing dick pics, so basically if I'm still single after residency...ur gonna get bombarded. It's gonna be a blizzard of dicks.
Feel free to keep your blizzard of dicks to yourself.
Its the damn oven. I think it wants to eat me.
I woke up with my shoes on but pants in the fish tank
Don't EVER mix a flaming shot, with a Jello shot.. As good as it sounds flaming Jello is not a good idea
Randomize
