Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
One can only hope that this night would end with my thumb in another humans rectum.
so apparently we got drunk enough at the reception to rip the center pieces apart and use the flower vases as "fancy glasses"
I thought making out with his sister would be a great way of meeting him. But it backfired.
He went into the alley to piss and came back a minute later with a case of Bud Select. I'm speechless.
Just took the worst coed shower ever. We both cried. AND I only shaved one leg.
Hundreds of bug bites..Dad jokingly says "looks like you passed out naked in the woods somewhere"
Pretty sure I just shit out pure stomach acid. I'll explain after you take me to a hospital
That freshman guy that keeps trying to hook up with me just saved someone's life ... Should I reconsider?
Meanwhile she's getting her law degree and I'm dropping Cool Ranch Doritos down my bra because I'm laying down eating on the couch
Thats not real though. Slash there are other extenuating circumstances to lead me to believe dick is wanted
HOLY FUCK I SPELLED EXTENUATING RIGHT ON THE FIRST TRY. IM THE BEST DRUNK NA
It's amazing the amount I can accomplish with a glass of wine in my hand.
Ugh, once again I had to block the view of him peeing off the hotel bar balcony, I earned those free drinks!
My friend Julia's mom just called her to say she got a puzzle in the mail made of cheese and when she put it together it spelled FUCK YOU and she doesn't know who it's from.
Would you say that skipping class and sitting alone in my room singing One Direction to myself and sobbing is an acceptable way to deal with the break-up
Randomize
