I just beer bonged a sparks. You better get your ass over here because no one is on my level yet
my one-armed grandma is doing the YMCA. you figure it out.
You have to stop getting hammered and preaching about that mission trip to Haiti.
Although last time you were unsure about someone they flipped a golf cart on me.
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
The first couple times was just weird, but after last night, I'm beginning to think you have a real problem banging pregnant women who are carrying someone elses child.
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
Grandma is giving me marriage advice again. On the plus side, she thinks I'm straight now.
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
Bud... Did you mean to tweet a picture of your dick? If not just letting you know.
He and I are in a competition of who can sleep with the most people at work. We're tied at two. I could win this if they'd stop hiring damn straight girls.
I have rug burns on my nipples. Thanks for being an awesome wing girl.
Quit giving me a hard time, whens the last time you got head every night? Cougars are where its at they dont play games
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
Randomize
