Just spent 45mins blow drying a joint i dropped in a beer....i felt like i dropped his infant child....
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
Lives are in shambles. Livers are in disrepair. Our friend was missing for 2 days. His brother slept in a porta potty. God damn you college world series
Oh you're gonna love this story. I almost cut off a little girl's pony tail.
Now you have tequila AND fuzzy slippers. Fuck you. I want that to be MY night.
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
pretty sure I just got a "sorry I have a new boyfriend" blow job. Confused, but totally ok with it.
This guy on Hoarders just said "we're all about 4 or 5 decisions away from shitting in a bucket". True dat
She's legally too young to drink and was making out with a guy who is ethically too old to drink.
last thing I remember is yelling 'sit on my face' through a traffic cone
There are grandparents doing keg stands I don't know
Was your bare penis on or around my blanket?
Last night I had a dream that I changed my last name to Vodka. what does that say about my life?
i fucked his best friend. once right next door to him. i'm pretty sure that could be called sweet revenge.
she gave me a ride on the back of her motor scooter and i swooned so hard
omg it's like all of your grease 2 fantasies come true i'm so happy for you
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