Theres puke in my trash can and spilled beer next to my bed... come get your girlfriend
Yeah, we realized keeping you in a cage wasn't beneficial to us
It took him longer to remove his skinny jeans than it did for him to finish. I didn't even have time to realize it sucked until it was already over.
One reason I don't come to Portland. I saw 8 guys I have had sex with last night. At the same party.
By 8 I mean 9.
And by 9 I mean 10.
Okay, just a casual question: how did i manage to get grass stains on the inside of my bra?
Do you think a former stripper/heroin addict constitutes as a high risk sexual partner?
Luckily my prof thought I was puking from nerves and gave me motivational mini speeches the entire final.
When you passed out on the kitchen counter she brushed and flossed your teeth, then carried/dragged you to bed. Why aren't you married?
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
U can be a future sentaor's wife if you want. I'm happy with "closet lesbian", "tech prof".and "masters degree" all rolled into one. Drunken bar escapades pay off.
I WAS KIDDING ABOUT SLUTEMBER BUT ITS ACTUALLY HAPPENING
There's no triumph quite like finally banging your high school boyfriend 6 years later
Would an open wound count as good sex or bad sex?
Apparently his version of saying "I'm Sorry" is streaking around our apartment building then asking for a blow job.....
It took me twenty minutes to read that sentence.
All I said was okay...
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