Nothing commands respect in a meeting like Jack Daniels on the breath. You're fine.
Small penises have feelings too.
so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
Ya I guess he's not a bad roommate. I mean if he wasn't here I would probably be more lazy and pee in bottles and stuff.
I am literally missing a chunk of eyelashes. That's how fun it was.
you called me in the middle of the night, wandering the streets, in search of "the ultimate burrito"
literally hosing herself off in my back yard with the hose. i offered her the shower but she refused. that drunk.
Or stump rather since he's possibly large. Large penises don't have tips, just blunt ends of battering rams.
He sent me a picture of his dick earlier so now we can all laugh at him tomorrow
Debating going to the grocery store with my vibrator still in, cause I can't stand the idea of it out. Lets do some risk/reward
I just started the bonfire using a tampon. Who knew they could have multiple uses?
alright well Taco Bell Closes at 12 so you better pray to god she's asleep by then or I'm running in your house butt ass naked with a bag of tacos
You're seeing with your vagina, not your eyes.
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
"hahahaha" is not a sufficient reply when I tell you my mother laughed at a joke about me giving blowjobs.
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