is it considered a "problem" when you find a pickle slice in your bed in the morning or is it like a "super-awesome bonus"?
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
It's official. Every single female in their late teens and early 20s get their fb statuses from a pool of cliched "quotes" which all say, without saying, "boys treat me like shit, I know they do, but one day I'll find 'the guy' who will treat me right no matter how psychotic I am." Vom.
I wouldn't accept the money so he folded the $20 bill into an origami puppy and left a note saying "Not blowjob money"
No but the chipped one is crooked now. Clearly I didn't use my hands to break my fall. I used my face
This santa hat i wore to the bar, served it's dual purpose as a vomit bag.
I just set a bowl of cap n crunch on fire. That high.
I stole something. Which direction out are you guys gonna go
Like if a baby's bottom had nipples, that's how my boobs feel
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
In other news, I'm pretty sure my mom was encouraging me to have a threesome yesterday... I don't even want to start digging in that garden of horror and trauma.
First day back to class and I have already pulled out the hard liquor
They ran out of toilet paper so I used the rug to wipe my vagina
Well I'm glad your Saturday night went a lot better than mine. I spent mine crying in a McDonald's parking lot.
I'm really excited to meet your new dude! But we really need to find out if he's your cousin first.
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