You're perfectly engineered for doggy style
I believe that I finger-banged my way to the top of the corporate ladder.
the 3rd commandment: and god said, if you buy a handle.. you must finish it.
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
I hate the Packers so much, I wouldn't cheer for them if they were playing al Qaeda.
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
I wish you would always start your sentences with "speaking of my clit..."
True that.. I am going to ride a gold plated unicorn across a field of cocaine and coach purses when I graduate.
That was beautiful.
This isn't just a hangover. I can feel the blood moving through my veins, and it hurts.
Just turned down sex because it's a holy day of obligation, my mom would be proud.
I literally paid cover, got kicked out. Tried to explain that I was just clumsy, but mispronounced it. Then I got pissed off, stormed out..and clotheslined myself on a velvet rope. How was your night?
He used the term 'cock-staggering' in an email. So needless to say things are going pretty well.
He broke his arm in a fistfight with the bouncer. it was neat.
my morning attempts to try to have sex with him was interrupted by the passion of the christ parade going on outside my house
DETAILS
long story
just tell me the parts i wanna hear
weed, brooklyn, rough sex.
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