can you call in chlamydia to work? like if the antibiotics they gave you for it are giving you the shits...
Awkward interaction of the day: Staring at some guy trying out if he is or is not the guy that woke me up yesterday by getting arrested in front of my apartment.
nothing says new school year like ambulances and police road blocks.
We have a tower of vodka coming. OF VODKA
Next time we're there I want drunk pics of us trying to ride the stone lions downtown. Don't even attempt to fight me on this.
Jen gave my number to some guy she met in NY. He sent me a picture of his weiner. He had nice shoes. I replied with a pic of bacon.
When in doubt always reply with bacon.
Hungover. Have to fix everything I've broken. I'm gonna be very late.
He said he doesnt believe in the female orgasm,so no I did not have sex with him.
Steve brought 6 joints and 2 bottles of makers mark, Josh shat himself in the pool, and Amy blew me. Hope that extra 3 dollars an hour for working overnights is still worth it.
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
is it too soon to tell him I'm available anytime for Christmas themed pity sex and I'll even wear a Santa hat?
Just taxi'd to the airport holding a zip lock bag of my own vomit. Bachelorette success.
Preface: Im drunk. But i think id make a good assasin. That is all.
I didn't want to shower, so I shaved my legs in the pool . That drunk .
Our sex sesh was interrupted by a bunch of hobos fighting outside his apartment.
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