i think the whole apartment complex could hear you beating off last night
Just called my mom. She definitely saw all those fb statuses so thanks for that.
Haha did she know what fisting meant?
Yeah. Which is upsetting in itself
I'm gonna have sex with a woman...help
Your brother came in a girls mouth for the first time last night... Ah the tales told whilst buying minors beer.
The cops walked in and cracked up bec he was passed out on the couch in a pink tutu.
Just got a message on OkCupid from a 20-year-old who has "Momma's Boy" tattoed across his chest and thinks the earth is bigger than the sun.
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
When you're awkward as a teenager, it never goes away. You just mask it. With makeup. And boobs.
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
smoked four grams out of a bong with a mixture of pool water and white rum. I applaud you for leaving before losing too many brain cells.
Apparently mr clean magic erasers don't clean blood off the ceiling
His Australian accent during sex made me think I was in an Outback Steakhouse commercial
New goal find someone I love enough to use these Japanese pancake flavored condoms on
I just puked in a chili’s bathroom... happy birthday to me
my Mom is now my Eskimo sister... she fucked my ex in my bed and took a selfie
Randomize
