Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
I think it might be brain cancer. Hangovers can't be this bad
While I was banging her, her cell rang. She checked to see who it was, answered it, and moaned, "I'm dumping you."
sitting on the counter. eating honey. crying, because coldplay sounds beautiful on the radio. highhhhh as the sky
You started a dance party so that you could steal their vodka and shouted "sailors out!"
Using the salt from a pretzel bag for tequila shots. Come over.
I stared at his lazy eye for so long, he thought I had one too. Then we bonded over our lazy eyes. I had to fake one all night. My head is fucking killing me. NEVER pretend to have a lazy eye.
just gonna show up naked this time. that way i dont have to worry about finding my clothes tomorrow
They should just send me home - I'm literally doing nothing but watching porn and listening to pandora.
You realize we were screaming in the car about our apartment next year because we can "bring home randoms whenever we want" and "stare at each other from our door ways"
You want to know how I feel? I feel like Cady Heron pushed me in front of a bus last night.
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
We lost. I'mma go home and drink more and do a face mask and wonder why it is that god put me on this Earth to suffer
Do you not realize that being Batman fulfills about 95% of my non-sexual fantasies?
Randomize
