I would really like to get high with Bill Nye. I'm being dead serious. Every step I take is literally a step I take because it will take me closer to Science Guy high.
We could get him to build Inspector Gadget.
I didn't know you were high TOOOO!!!
you force-fed me gummy vitamins while screaming "I JUST WANT YOU TO BE HEALTHY" i have never been so terrified in my life.
I think the main reason you were throwing up so much was the quart of soap you chugged trying to burp bubbles. you came close
it's not like i was drunk to the point of NEEDING help...i just wanted someone to offer to hold my hair or something.
Just a heads up before you get home. Took the shelves out of the fridge so i could fit the beer ball and bucket of riot punch. Apparently i decided the stove was the best place to keep them. They got cooked when we pre heated to cook a bird we shot. This may be the final straw for our security deposit
She gave us all a pep talk at the bus stop at 1 AM. It involved cupcakes and somehow ended with her making out with her best friend. God bless college.
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
somehow this went from sexting to explaining my eating disorder.
I miss her, but also fucked her ex boyfriend.... So there's that
Yeah you burned that bridge with your vagina
I feel like we need to find him and explain that if the two of them would just fuck he'd understand.
Ladies don't puke and tell
Buying drug test kits off amazon. And qualifying for amazonSmile donation to a kids hospital feels wrong and funny at the same time xD
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
One day when i undoubtedly need an intervention please let it include lightsabers.
I think I can handle that.
Sextember may be over, but Cocktober is just beginning!!!
Randomize
