Totally saw a hot amputee. I think this is called character growth.
like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
I want to dip my vagina in sugar. Not only will it be sweet, but it will have a nice sparkle.
I can die happy now, I have been kicked out of strip clubs on six different continents
I just encountered the most annoying guy on the planet. I wanted to slap his milkshake out of his fat-boy hands while he was talking to me at the same time as slurping his liquid fat.
I love milkshakes.
Not the point.
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
...She was shooting whiskey using a turkey baster...i was horrified.
There still is not and there never will be anything as magical as getting high while listening to William Shatner's version of Bohemian Rhapsody.
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
returning from a 6am booty call in 2 feet of snow on a Tuesday is a bold new kind of low for me
I'm literally in my bed still trying to find the energy to take my corset off so I can binge eat oreos
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
I would say don't do anything I wouldn't do, but we both know I forget about my personal safely when getting laid is on the line
NOT PREGNANT according to the two dollar tree pregnancy tests I took in the tacobell bathroom. Come meet me at tacobell for celebratory soft tacos.
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