I want 2 things right now, you or a cig
cig
I love seeing the creepers that friend request me outside of facebook. its like seeing a unicorn in the middle of campus.
Just realized the hot girl at the office got a boob job over the Holiday.....she is now super-hot girl.
oh hey summer self, welcome to endless thirsty thursdays and walks of shame.
I never thought I would say the free bottle of grey goose was the problem but it was
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
Mom just Facebook checked into an Applebees at 2am. Caption: ''WITH THE BESTIEZ.''
adding to the list of how to lure in freshman boys: take dogs for a walk, yell at them from across the street, sit on the curb at 3 in the morning sobbing
Oh boy. Send him a care package with laxative cookies and alcohol. So he can shit himself while he's passed out drunk.
We're eating jello shots in the library. I love the day after Valentine's
It's amazing where one well timed dick pic can get you in life.
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
Was just told that I slept on the counter using a loaf of bread as a pillow. Clearly my life is going well.
everytime he speaks i want to fuck him less. i just wanna tell him to shut up and take his pants off and we could both be happy.
I am watching a girl dressed up as santa, full on fat suit, try to fight a six foot 200lb man. A reindeer threw beer on everyone. Shit is going down
Randomize
