hey, what are you doing tonight?
sleeping, g'night!
but i wanted to see you :(
sleeping! g'night!(801): i miss you!
stop - you have a right hand - use it!
I realized today that I should stop thinking so much with my vagina instead of my brain.
Please tell me this doesn't mean another "surprise road trip" where I spend all my money on gas and the SURPRISE destination is the abortion clinic.
But what if I pay for the gas?
My co-worker just asked me if i colored my hair. Time to take a shower.
I wish orgasms lasted as long as the pain from rug burn
i really should have bought real food rather than condoms, olives, coleslaw and beer...
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
I had to jump out of her car while it was moving enough said
I'd feel sorry for him and his injury but it's an inconvenience for my vagina
Occasionally I curse my inner 15 year old when I'm fulfilling their dreams as a slut, but I roll with it.
A horseman, i repeat, a man on a horse downtown just told me i was gorgeous and my friends were not. Not drunk enough.
I feel so nauseous and all I want is string cheese. My life never makes sense.
Went to 7-11 to buy condoms with the $20 I found on the ground outside Rite Aid. A good day for drug stores
I just heard your voicemail. Glad you like my dick and think I'm cool
but I have boobs. I'm not going to buy my own drinks at the bar like some kind of fucking animal.
I came so hard I went blind for a few seconds.
Randomize
