just took a sink shower in Arbys bathroom
Whoa Z and x make the same sound
I mean, keeping the tube socks on AND taking cell phone pictures that he didn't ask for during sex? that's two strikes kiddo.
Well, a cop just pulled up. This could go either way.
i feel like the wall was a canvas for his penis.
I just found the gloves and lightbulb I stole. Did you pee on a ATM inside a bank?
So the stripper who poured a beer on my head also gives great head. Even she doesn't know why she went home with me. No more mystery shot challenges.
I swear the crows are laughing at me.
You my friend are stoned into submission
Indeed. Apparently I called my sisters and told them I wouldn't get arrested because it's not a real sword.
Only you could make a stripper uncomfortable by eye fucking her too much.
TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.
I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex
I was so ripped I had a natty light box over my head carrying a spray bottle out in the streets trying to give car washes.
yea, she was legit pissed that her rasberry vodka ice cubes never actually froze. but we couldnt convince her otherwise.
I talked to his mom for a good 10 minutes with coke all over my nose. Not the best first impression
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