What happened last night?
You soiled yourself again and told everybody that you'd given birth.
You taught me that having a dip while u shit is awesome. I appreciate u for that
I decided to follow my clitoris instead of my heart.
Just because he's a soilder doesn't mean his dick is a hero.
remember, YOU ARE A WINNER
my dinner was a box of cheezits simultaneously mixed in with cocoa puffs and fried rice.
im honestly just eating salsa and looking at his penis
No that means he must've used the nipple clamps
I guess I was trying to make a cheese sandwich, I had to change my sheets cuz I slept on it and the cheese melted all over me, Dave, and my bed
Witnessing a crazy lady on the bus screaming about how romney is one of the four horsemen of the apocalypse.
Go to the bar. Find a girl. Ask if she can cook. Tell her you have a guitar at home. Ask her if she wants to see it. Bring her home. Sleep with her. Tell her it's your birthday in the morning. Enjoy your made with lust breakfast.
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
You ripped his router out of the wall and screamed "I have defeated the matrix"
I blacked out after the piñata full of condoms
Randomize
