I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
maybe i would like her more if 99% of her sentences didn't start with "yesterday when i was reading twilight..."
found the other keg... it's in the tree
I woke up and he had cut my bangs and put makeup on me.
I don't care how good they make you look, you've got to stop sleeping with gay guys.
This whole night would have been avoided if the liquor store had air heads
Now have a vodka water and get your shit together
I figured you left because I was a shit show. Were you still there when I got locked in the bathroom and didn't know where I was? If not, that could have been a dream. I'm still not sure.
Im on my period and I feel like I'm going to die. The only thing that can make this tolerable is for you to eat me out in the shower. Please. I'll do anything.
It's like the sisterhood of the traveling vaginas over here
I want to own their dicks and all the attachments
Dude I sat in the corner of the party bobbing my head and singing danger zone
The thought "Ummm which pants am I wearing? ...I *am* wearing pants, right?" just ran through my head. I'm done. So done.
All I have are vague memories of us eating ham?
My first love was gay too, it's okay.
I just saw a girl on the phone crying and eating a sandwich. Thats talent right there.
Randomize
