Astroglide: It's like Bengay for your ass.
it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
He's been dead since March and more people write on his wall than mine.
my grandma was just praying before dinner, and before she could finish my gpa lifted his glass and said 'and here's to avatar!'
Nobody is wearing shirts anymore. What is happening.
it would be cheaper just to buy a dildo to intimidate people with.
I just remember being happy that I got that toilet fixed so I had somewhere close to throw up
It's like shitshowville, population: those girls.
my mom called me mid shot and i accidentally answered and kept calling her my own name. somehow i thought that would help the situation.
The international association of gay square dance clubs had a booth set up in the lobby of my hotel.
I'm straight up riding in the back of my truck in a bean bag chair right now. Feet propped up and four loko in hand. Glorious.
walk of shame. I'm wearing my rain jacket over my dragon costume. My tail keeps dragging in the rain.
Well. I had to explain to my niece that the word cunt is not an abbreviation for country. I'm the best aunt in the world.
Can't we just go back to fucking and having your boyfriend think you're completely straight?
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