Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
you told his mom that the only thing he wants for christmas is his dick in your mouth
Are you still at the party or did I leave?
Missing a small section of hand. Hope your night is going better
A piece of cheeseburger just fell between my tits. Consider this a "wish you were here" postcard.
It's a system.. i get to hook up with them and you get to play words with friends with them afterwards.
It's gotten to the point that the dirty talk in my head when I touch myself has your accent
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
He peed off the roof and then we bonded it was beautiful
I'm either a high functioning alcoholic or I'm making the most of the fact that this is the last year that its socially acceptable to be black-out drunk five days a week.
at one point while they were drilling into my jaw I just remember thinking "will I ever be able to suck dick again"
I finally broke my dry spell. I did it. D-do-da-Dora.
He just snapchatted me a blank snap that said "miss our sex" Vagina game too strong
And then you screamed, "I JUST WANNA POUR MAPLE SYRUP ALL OVER HIM AND RAVISH HIS BODY!!"
So apparently my bro is going to make me fix his tattoo this trip... He sent me a pic of said tattoo. Tattoo is of a sperm, on his penis, which was in a woman's mouth... Wth
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