I just caught Brandon licking the fake chocolate on a smores ornament
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
I'm gonna play a drinking game called "Sarah takes the train"
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
So he told me he wanted to fertilize my caviar. Im avoiding all foreign exchange students from now on.
Got him to take a shot from the drip pan on the George Forman. He's gone now.
please come upstairs a drunk asian is lying down n the middle of my room and i don't know him
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
I mean I sucked his dick at 3 AM... UNDERWATER. I think I have earned a follow back on twitter.
I look like shit btw. Like the joker from Batman.
I'm not sure how that's possible unless you put on face paint. Which I would respect.
I've already come to terms that I'm gonna have to bone a few gross librarians, but hey, it's college
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
you just won the triple crown of sex! your prize is more sex.
It all started with a game of naked twister.
1. I drank goldschlager 2. I fell in a bathtub and hit my head (hard) on a soap dish. 2. I sat in said bathtub talking to a random stranger on vacation from wyoming (who i met at a 711 looking for taquitos) for almost an hour. 3. We got kicked out of said bathtub by owner of bathtub. 4. We had sex.
Randomize
