We need to rekindle our bromance
Last night at the bar my fuck buddies found out about each other.
Wtf? What happened?
Not quite sure but they rock, paper, scissored to see who was taking me home.
you thought you were invisible so you started narrating your actions.
I just accidentally stumbled into an AA meeting...I think its a sign
Our sex bag has now been upgraded to sex luggage, with wheels, and now features a first aid kit. Game. On.
i woke up to banging and pieces of ceiling falling on my face
I recorded his orgasm, set it as his ringtone, and called him while they were singing happy birthday to his mom. Yeah, revenge is sweet.
But I aced my quizzes. Apparently flash card beer pong is an acceptable form of studying.
I'm not gonna lie. I'm a little scared.
Good. The Jell-O shots look great.
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
sorry I called you to cry about the state of the neopets economy
I brought her cheeseburgers and tequila but she's still mad at me.
(440): please tell me you didn't have sex in my dress.. IT'S A VIRGIN DRESS.
The thing I'm gonna miss about him is his dick.
Guy just rode past on a lowrider bike smoking a blunt, I want his life
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