Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
i think im the only person who makes thank you cards for their drug dealer
Just got off the phone with poison control. They're more concerned about our alcohol intake than that the beer bong was last cleaned with pine sol.
Ok, but If I make this happen, my first born son gets to fuck your first born daughter
There is tupperware vodka. thats right tupperwares full of vodka. best leftovers ever
Get over here. It's an emergency. Just realized I haven't hd my mouth on a penis in two weeks. Get over here.
she looked at me completely serious and said "orgasms are 15% Stronger during a hurricane" and started to take all her clothes off
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
I'm going to get like 25 drinks at their wedding and just leave them sitting around or give them to hobos.
i need to un-sleep with a few of those brothers before we ever go back to that house again. i'm serious. i will not be a fraternity groupie.
Fuck you, I'm yelling at a mountain right now
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
Hey so I got my period
Thank god I wasn't ready to deal with sober you for 9 months
Don't forget my pants whenever you come over, otherwise we can't get in.
He had a tattoo of the Batman logo around his asshole. I noped right the hell out of there.
Randomize
