what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
I can't believe you made out with me with a french fry in your mouth.
He was pretty wasted I guess, but the crippled guy threw the first punch it was awesome
Just smoked pot with a guy who has apparently been living in the woods for over a month. He just walked out of the woods. This is not real life.
What kind of costume was that supposed to be??
I'm an orgasm trader!
Only I could get hit on by homophobic straight guys in a drag bar.
Another development in my life...I think I pulled a muscle in my neck from vomiting this weekend.
How much do souls cost? I feel like I need one if those.
just passed the gas station where we took pregnancy tests. memories.
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.
I'm perplexed as to why anyone on this planet is straight
Well. I think my red tank top is jinxed. this is now the second time it's gotten jizz on it.
He’s over 6 feet has amazing posture and went to Harvard and has an awesome job and a great dick and loves Jesus and is an organ donor
Is this the guy you have listed as free food in your phone
Noooo he’s listed as free food #5
Just a typical Friday. Dinner, drinks, doing lines with a member of Congress
Mimosas make me so tired. I just ordered a huge thing of pasta and gonna eat it in my underwear like a bad bitch
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