Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
I just sat there and watched paula deen's face melt for an hour.
By the way, I got bored last night and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
Dude. That is just waaaay to much random to process after that tequila battle.
Oh thank Jesus fuck for my shitty infertile womb. Crisis averted
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
What kind of costume was that supposed to be??
I'm an orgasm trader!
I think people like me is why alcohol became illegal at one point
I started a USA chant at the bar last night for no reason, other than being plastered. Within 15 seconds, I was standing on a table and the whole bar was chanting but nobody knew why.
I can't decide which is better: the sex, or remembering that I have ice cream in the freezer after he left
I just watched your sister pour half a bottle of cotton candy flavored snow cone syrup into a bottle of marshmallow flavored vodka, take a swig, frown, and pour a cherry coke in.
Just wait until she offers you a "powerita"
Crying while I'm pooping. I think this is rock bottom
Nah, I was done when the Big Pun lookalike began to sob and tell me I looked like his ex...
dude idk where I am. fuckin like. there wheat field and a horizon and shit. I think I got on a bus? some dude named Sam gave me a pamphlet about Jesus.
She never came back from the bathroom so I went to look for her... I was in my room and heard this rustling. And she was in my closet petting ties.
Randomize
