You can't motorboat a personality
hey im gonna send you a picture of my dinner
if its a picture of your dick again we are no longer friends
you guys are cousins why the FUCK are your pants off
He always grinds on me and is like "This is awesome because we're both Catholic!"
Remembering I sold my brand new Blackberry to a stranger for a few pints = Worst night of my life. Now to work out what I did with my shoes.
dude he passed out in the strip club on his birthday, WHILE he was getting a lap dance. That drunk.
got one for peeing in public....called the cop a donut dunking communist...should be a fun court appearance
Some poor guy found you passed out in a bathroom stall. Again with your dick out. Looks like you got to rage after all.
he said didn't have much sexual experience and then proceeded to tell me he is going to make me cum harder than my vibrator could
well, that escalated quicky
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
Well I've made a drinking game out of the Wiggles but I think I've got this babysitting thing down
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
Is there a single word to describe 'the last guy she slept with before meeting her husband'? Cause there should be.
She's not answering my calls
Well it sounds like you really fucked up
WHO HOLDS A GRUDGE OVER MEMES
You don't feed me, fuck me, or fulfill me.
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