My grandmass entire neighborhood is over for dessert and i'm high as fuck...about to make a couple of freshman boys real uncomfortable
Freshman in high school? Just your type
I only have two rules. But i've fotgotten those rules and replaced them w 2 other rules
yeah so our basement was flooded 4 feet. we just smoke and drank and then went swimming. gotta make the best out of it
just fought my dog for the chicken pie I dropped on the floor.
like a sex slave...but with a better dental insurance plan
He crawled in my bed this morning, ate me out, and even brought me a panera deli sammie for lunch at school. I don't care what he lied about, all is forgiven him.
Dont forget about the tuna sandwich behind your TV
As for the 14 hours of vodka. I am all that is man.
Can you bring home bongs? Like all the bongs. I need bongs
and everyone will high five me and girls will approach me offering blowjobs
I didn't know that all of his brothers would be hot and musical too. That's a dick move on behalf of biology.
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
This friendship isnt goin to work if you dont respond to my drunk texts
Nice classy night out before we roll our faces off
What's the point of having a gay best friend if he doesn't play with your titties?
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