After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
TLC. RIGHT NOW. PRIMORDIAL TODDLERS.
Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
There's cake. And donuts. And strippers. It's like 5 year old me and 20 year old me are throwing a party together...
In honor of the internet blackout, I think everyone needs to change their Facebook pictures to ones of them being blacked out.
I'm the brains and you're the boobs of this operation.
got blackout drunk at the conference and wandered around Minneapolis with a homeless person until one of the other interns found me...I think I'm ready for adulthood.
I was figuring I'd break up with her after work, but before Taco Tuesday
The struggle bus has heated seats and stops at Dunkin on Friday mornings so I'll be okay.
the last thing I remember is taking a pull of ever clear and chasing it with vodka
Sorry I've been a slutty nightmare this week
If she didn't block me, she would have known that I sneezed on her toothbrush.
THERE HAS BEEN GRANDTHEFT IN THE HOUSE. SOMEONE STOLE THE BABYWIPES AND YOU NEED TO BUY MORE BEFORE WE LET YOU IN. oh and you have to take two shots before we'll let you in. with no chaser.
As long as there is beach, drink, dick, in that order. I’m in.
Randomize
