Oh, don't even get me started. Harry Potter is so pure. Twilight is just teenage girl porn.
I hope God doesn't listen to everybody on a Saturday night.
I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
oh fat girl friday strikes again...
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
Hey I never found my wallet but i did find a bag of 14 soft taco supremes
I have your wallet. Trade you for the tacos.
I literally need to be slapped with another cock just to notice it.
He picked up a chick with a line about the price of used cars in Sri Lanka and developing economies. Step it up.
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
Just recreated a sandwich from the caf in my own kitchen. Graduation denial at it's finest.
I think I just legit sprained my wrist from holding myself up while giving a blow J. God dammit come already
On the plus side, I know I'm allergic to latex now. Like really fucking allergic
Why didn't you ever bring me to the pope as a baby so he could kiss me.
When is the right time to ask your new roommate for her school schedule so she doesn't walk in on you fucking some rando in the kitchen in the middle of the afternoon?
Randomize
