I cannot stress to you how much better your current situation is than listening to gay sex
i threw up on the blunt... he was pissed.
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
I feel like I should come with a warning like "Orgasm free since 1983"
oh no, don't get me wrong.. she IS really pretty. If you are in to horses or Sarah Jessica Parker.
just walked into the study room and found an empty bottle of vodka and a passed out freshman. Did you have anything to do with this?
Btw any and all sexual fantasies or arousal I had about cops is null and void.
all i tweeted was "emergency this is not a drill" and he immediately texted me asking if this was a subtle booty call…it was
How's my sex life is me mastubating next to her dog. that's how it's going.
If she gets mad at me, that only means more free time for me. I like to put myself I win win situations. Despite being in a relationship, I still find ways to accomplish my goals.
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
Some guy walking down the sidewalk just looked at me and said "hey it's the world champ". How drunk was I on Friday...?
Everytime after he came, he'd laugh uncontrolably for ten mintutes. He was sober..
I told her I wanted to go swimming and she responded with jello shots, taking off her clothes, and jumping into the pool...I think I'm in love
My ex's sister asked me to be her date to Thanksgiving. Should I go?
Threesome!
Randomize
