i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
good thing vaginas are great cup holders
i told her that i loved her pillow breasts and then she asked me if i wanted to motor boat them. so yea, i do need the room tonite.
I wouldnt endorse that guy if he was walking in a walkathon to raise money for a disease i had
Well on a lighter note, guess who just threw up in the elevator
i think you walked me home, then i felt bad for putting you through the trouble so i walked you home...i'm not sure how i got home after that.
we cut her off and put her in bed but by the time we got back to the drinks she was already there shirtless. she's the topless tequila ninja
She wasnt impressed wen i brought a guy for her back with me, a 3am impromptu sperm donor is not a gd birthday present. Im a bad gf.
the gays at disneyland are vicious
IF I CAN STICK YOUR DICK IN MY MOUTH, I CAN STICK MY GUM ON YOUR NIGHTSTAND.
you dont know your limits until you wake up with a black eye and a bruised rib and find out you got ran over by a bicycle last night
I just ordered $70 worth of pizza and I'm not even ashamed. Happy Valentine's Day to me.
Just to clarify, i'm coming over for tacos not a threesome
Fuck your fuckin pumpkin spice. You and your subtle differences frighten and disgust me.
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