dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
take the plastic off of my new air freshener and i'm not going to eat you out for a month.
I wish my period boobs were my regular boobs.
Just pulled over to throw up in a day care parking lot while the kids were outside playing. The adults were mortified.
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
yeah come on over we're just pre gaming for the grocery store
It started with jello shots. It ended with tears.
It's cool, I power napped on the dryer while they were fucking in the bathroom so I'm good to go now. Where are you?
Unfortunately, the Bilbo Baggins adventure side of me that likes to go on adventures appears to be losing to the side of me that likes to smoke weed in the bathtub and watch Workaholics.
So when this rash is gone wanna hang out?
It made me want to take you home, put you in footie pajamas and feed you spaghettios
OMG MY DAD TOLD ME HE MIGHT DO TINDER
I'm nothing if not determined to sleep with everyone at that company
Its that time in the evening when I've had a few cocktails and wish you'd make a video about the packers and Jack Daniels.
He's the first boyfriend I wouldn't cheat on. This is a really big deal for me
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