porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
I had five suicidal voicemails from him when I woke up this morning. They all started and ended with "DON'T FUCK MY ROOMMATES".
It was only one, it doesn't count.
Just don't have "pin the tail on the straight edge" as a party game... Please and thanks...
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
You can identity the picture as me the mistress his wife and him. It's that kinda awkard.
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
I feel like our low point of the night was when we had to start chasing with ice cubes and wheat thins.
She said we could only have sex if she got to keep her fake moustache on during
Super awkward that I just now realized I added no verb to the first statement about super hero porn. We were watching it, not making it. Clarity.
You raged at the rock climbing place for not selling beer and then just said "fuck it" and pulled out a flask.
This guy at the airport was telling me 3/4 dudes in his group got rufied at some strip club. One guy woke up in the hospital, another found himself in a random parking garage, the other got back to the room and they all shit their pants. Go Vegas.
Why is there a cash register on top of my car?
We can't go out this weekend. My uterus is so desperate it's given me permanent beer goggles
I fully support your bad decision but I do not approve of your unironic use of the word yolo
Life lesson: if a hot naked girl tells you to spit on something, you spit on it. No questions.
Randomize
