Just ran to the store on my way to the office to buy Diet Coke...the guy in front of me let me cut because it was 4 more minutes until 8am, so he wouldn't be able to purchase his vodka. I love Wisconsin
it was all downhill after the free blackjack taco
just stole 2 cases of forties from some freshman in the woods by pretending to be a cop. that ten dollar spotlight is really turning a profit
I can't figure out how to get this beer bong in my carry on without airport security questioning me as it goes through the x-ray.
They reenacted the scene from the lion king where mufasa talked to simba from the clouds. As high as they were they got it word for word. There has to be an award for that.
It's not really that big. Girls just think it feels big. It's a cocktical illusion.
Btw any and all sexual fantasies or arousal I had about cops is null and void.
Got with someone dressed up as Allen from the hangover so that's where I'm at in life
she had a dildo shaped like a dolphin. she will forever be known as Flipper
it was her dad's 50th birthday kegger. Within the first 5 minutes I got punched in the ear from an off-duty cop and smoked a joint the size of my vibrator.
oh yeah, and she got boxed-out by said cop. Then her dad turned around and high-fived him for it
I do not mind being torn from the first touches of sleep to see a man who looks like that
Going overboard is basically 75% of my personality
I'm a gorgeous hot mess
Pretty sure I just scored Election Day sex based on the theory that if either of these fools win the world as we know it is over so we might as well get a few orgasms in...
Like people might wonder why I put up with your puns. You give good head and play with my hair
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
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