dude u gotta turn down the techno when u bang that chick its creepy
U of I kids don't fist pump to Sweet Caroline. Get me the fuck out of here.
Some girl in the stall next to me just yelled "fuck yes i started my period!" she came out of the stall and we high fived. who am i to judge? i do that every month.
I got a job at a micro-brewery. Now who made the bigger mistake, them or me?
Hey man thanks for carrying me in and out of that frat house. There's no I in team.
But don't worry I didn't actually get stitches, although according to the health center I probably should have
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
Those two lesbians inspired me. A whole new way to roll. Fuck shots. Gallons of vodka is the new tequila.
It's kind of like, standing in a garage and pretending you're a car. Except you're naked.
We broke into her grandpa's pool at 2 am and I held my underwear out the window on the way home.
Yes but funny for a 45 year old hell bent on reliving her college days by giving body shots and hand jobs. Not necessarily in that order
I woke up with a captain's hat on my desk.
She was riding me and giving me score updates to the basketball game at the same time..... Shes a keeper
so my dads pretending to use the snow blower and theres absolutley no snow one the ground.... someone should really lock our liqour cabinet
It’s so white trash that I almost have to have it.
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