When I was her age, Pluto was still a planet... but i said what the hell
I just remember standing in the shower with you eating chips.
My grandma just told me that she sharted, no I am not having fun in El Paso.
we are cloud gazing and there is one that looks like a giant baby riding a dolphin and smoking a joint
i wish there was a reasonable explanation for why this reminds me of you
Just spent the last three hours in the library successfully refreshing facebook
just saw someone climb out of the dumpster at cvs and start walking down the street like it was completely normal
It's not like I ment to feed you the shots of vodka, my hand just kinda slipped.
She kept crying and asking why I couldn't look more like Dennis quaid.
Just saw pictures of a pregnant teen from my hometown with an American flag wrapped around her naked body posted on FB without irony. These are my roots.
Like, he's a nice guy. But he's better at fingering than he is at speaking.
She walked home carrying a six pack of beer and someone elses cat
SHE BETTER HAVE BROUGHT BACK MY FUCKING COUCH CUSIONS OR SHES GUNNA GET IT.
i'm almost positive she was a dude but like it doesn't even matter
re read what you just said
went out last night. woke up with a lisp.
How high?! We watched paid programming for 45 minutes before we realized it wasn't just a long commercial. So pretty high. The Bionic fish finder looks promising, though.
Lets get a boat first.
According to the rule of quantum porn mechanics, the mere thought of something kinky causes it to exist. So out there, somewhere, there is already riddler/smurf porn...
Randomize
