and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
Nothing better then your mother meeting someone you randomly had sex with and him introducing himself as the guy who rocked her world once.
apparently "my dealer got arrested" is not an acceptable answer when mom asks "What happened? You look sad today"
should i be impressed or disgusted that i was spitting glow-in-the-dark?
Pre warning. Your not gonna sleep tonight cuz I'm staying with your roommate. Thanks for breaking up with me.
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
Woke up with two cats staring at me. One covered in puke thats giving me a look that says it might be my fault. Where am I? Come get me.
found a cell phone. in the freezer. wrapped in bologna. explain?
I'm going to have to start playing roller derby again so I can blame my sex-related bruises on that.
Nah I've been there. The worst you'll see is some hobo peeing in a sewer at 3 am on a Saturday
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
I know that you sometimes make decisions based on comedic effect, but losing your virginity shouldn't be one of them.
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
Unexpected pro of the hostel though: literally down the street from Coors Field. I could literally fart on the building in five minutes.
Straight boys are literally imbeciles. If Darwinism doesn’t get them female rage will.
Randomize
