you should just get pregnant. that way you don't need to decide on a career.
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
we spent fifteen minutes trying to convince you that you weren't locked inside of your car
On that note if you see a hobo smiling with a pack of cigarettes and an AMP energy drink, that was my good deed for the day
I keep having to have that awkward "I don't want to have sex with you" convo. I thought wearing sweatpants was suppose to prevent this situation..
He was so good, that I'm pretty sure he fucked his religion into me. P.S. I'm Jewish now.
If we can only get laid once in a blue moon, apparently this will be our month.
You know I think I am ok with him not moving in yet. He came over, fixed my closet, ate me out, and left. I'm now in sweats drinking coke and rum and watching new girl. This works for me.
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
We were getting fries and you hopped the counter and yelled "WELCOME TO GOOD BURGER HOME OF THE GOOD BURGER" and threw up
Ran into a tinder match at the bar last night. We spotted each other and started making out without speaking any words to each other. Fuck yea technology!
I'm pretty sure my munchies are the only reason Good and Plenty is still around
Cooked. Eating pizza. Didn't have a napkin so I took my shirt off and I'm using it.
I was giving you head in the kitchen, and when I looked up you were eating a quesadilla.
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
Randomize
