Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
Come with me and I'll find you a girl. What's your type?
Vagina
Is it bad that when I see ugly people make out, I hope he's impotent?
I swear I am going to pee, wipe my vag with my hand, and then slap you in the face with it.
Sex on a trampoline was so worth getting a mosquito bite on my penis
We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
I also would have accepted most things ending in "job", erotic favors, and food.
Not much, really baked..... beethoven is AMAZING it's like i'm flying in space with baby jesus
did you know the cops in wilco have clean up kits in their cars for when people puke in them? i found this out this morning. i'm finishing paperwork now. come get me plz?
She sprained her ankle last night trying to flash me.
Why can't people give useful wedding gifts...like sex swings or Nutella?
I wish I knew the extent of my injuries before I climbed over the fence. Might have avoided the need to purchase a cupholder for my wheelchair.
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
he had to stop me from eating snow off the street on the way back to pick up our cars. that's how hungover i am.
Randomize
