I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
I just saw a guy in a sombrero and holding an inflated blow-up doll in all her "glory" get escorted out of the mall. I hate Marley.
My makeup looks extraordinary for nine tequila shots, running four blocks, falling asleep with my face in the toilet, and doing the walk of shame across campus in the rain. And to think I'm single.
in the middle of getting head my cat meowed. she looked up , meowed back, and then continued giving me head.
who's idea was it to start the NCAA tournament less than a week after St. Patrick's day? My liver needs time to recover for things like this.
You told me I couldn't make out with you until I added you on LinkedIn
Come over. We're getting stoned and watching DogTV
I don't remember coming in last night, but apparently I ate a piece of pizza because when I woke up I had pizza crust stuck to the back of my thighs.
You give an incredible blow job. I wanted to make sure you know it was appreciated
At least I know that however bad my life gets and how low I can feel I'll never feel shitting in a red robin parking lot low
I'm naked in a forest ranger station right now
The sorting hat of life was not kind to you.....
Wait, how many people just saw my dick?
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
You should not be involved with someone who smells like that. Because that smell seriously does not go away. Even if you can't actually smell it at any given point, it will still haunt you
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