At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
I'm so hungover even the car commercials make me nauseas
he said i give him, and i quote, "emotional blue balls"
you inspire me to be a worse person
Oh, and trying to figure out who wants to do Molly in a frat is like asking damn children if they want puppies and candy. So just bring as much as possible.
she broke my one feeling. seriously I think she broke my dick.
He was having a "party in the princess castle." At what point do I blindfold him and take him to AA?
I was giving this guy head and he stopped me to look me in the eyes and say "you have a gift"
Hey my results were negative. Your chlamydia train stops here. Happy hunting!
Most people would probably take his lack of responses as a queue to stop. But nope, not me. I just keep going. And that's why I don't have a bf, just a little weinered friend
Just go read my twitter... There's a play by play. It starts with a penis pump
I just blew thrown up hashbrowns out my nose. That's the level of this hangover.
the roommate is literally cooking green eggs n ham, and I'm too hungover to see straight. Dr Seuss nightmare.
I got a gay guy to motorboat me. These tits could change the world, I'm telling you.
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