Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
I just made out with a girl with a life jacket on wtf is going on
I mean there is a rehab there so its gotta be a good time
He wants to buy me a drink to apologize for sending me a pic of his dick. Welcome to my life.
I hoped the great care he put into rolling a blunt would translate to my vagina.
We can get high as fuck when there are no orders. If not its cool. I just figured Take Your Blunt Buddy To Work Day.
We left the bar and you kept yelling "ONWARD SCION, TO GLORY!!"
I actually haven't slept with anyone in a while. I think my whore phase is just seasonal.
KY in my mouth and throat does not a party make.
you left your anal beads in the dishwasher
I took a vibrator for a weekend with my parents instead of a boyfriend. I obviously have my life together.
That awkward moment when you hear your boss yelling during sex while you're on her couch eating Easy Mac.
I WILL go to space. And if we find aliens I WILL fuck one. It’s the Marine Corps way
Randomize
