Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
So I'm eating my sandwich... and a penny fell out of it.
trust me, there is no more disappointing feeling in the world than waking up at 4 in the morning with a random half naked chick in your bed and then realizing your roommates girlfriend just wandered into the wrong room.
The only piece of furniture in the apartment is a wine rack.
My god. We'll be gay porn millionaires.
Any day you don't mysteriously wake up in the garbage is a good day.
Not a chance. She stuck her hand under my kilt and she told the whole table I was indeed commando. She broke all the rules.
That would warm my breasts.
In this context breast is a metaphor for soul.
I passed out with my wizard stick taped to my hands and got woken up being poked with a St. Bernard
i did nothiing wrong other than not tell that kid his whole back was covered in puke
New hot neighbor boys moving in across from us...So i did the logical thing and bought two 30 packs up the hill and walked right by em. Consider the line hooked and ready to reel.
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
I'm at a sex party and there's a guy in an ICP jersey and trip pants. I see now that this is the moment in the movie of my life I recognize I have a problem
Dude, he turned on “London Bridge” by Fergie and GAVE ME A LAP DANCE.
Randomize